Twenty-Two Holiday Connecting Conversations
Welcome to Thanksgiving week! You will be gathering with family or friends who have become like family for meals, games, gifts and sharing of stories. My own family is doing the same and as one inclined toward deeper connecting experiences I’ve been brainstorming ways we could make more of it all. Additionally, as our parent’s generation ages there will be fewer holidays ahead to hear and explore their experiences. The elders are keepers of the family story until that fateful day when the mantle of responsibility is handed to their children. Making this coming meal something meaningful could make this festivity one that will be remembered for a generation.
Making this coming meal something meaningful could make this festivity one that will be remembered for a generation.
The following prompts can be used in whatever context and manner that fits. Pick one question from the list and write it on a chalk board when folks arrive; or print the page and give everyone a copy to work through together; or cut the questions into slips, place in a mason jar to pass around and each person draws a prompt for response; or come up with your own questions. Some of these require a little advance prep so preview these ahead of time. May this season be one of honor and delight and depth!
PERSONAL HISTORY
Prop Talk. Bring a picture, keepsake or memento from your childhood. Show and tell folks the story and meaning of it.
Best Friend. Who was your childhood best friend? Tell the story of what brought you together and what bonded you in those years?
Big Adventure. Consider an experience that as a child felt adventurous, exciting and dangerous. Share the event and how you look back to it from your present perspective.
Fondly Family. What extended family member (aunt, uncle, cousin…) did you feel particularly fond of or admire as a child? What was it about them that was so intriguing?
Parents’ Grandparents. Tell us what you remember about your grandparents. Describe their personality, quirks, routines, what they smelled like, how they dressed, what they ate, what their voice sounded like.
Grandparent Slide Show. Gather a variety of 20-40 old family pictures from the elder members of the meal. Scan and prepare a slide show, or print large versions, and invite the grand parents to retell the story of the display picture for the gathering.
Home Town. Take us through your childhood home town. Where did you spend your time? Where was the school, church, ice cream parlor, and favorite restaurant? What was the reputation of the town? What was the secret or subtleties that outsiders were unaware?
Military Salute. What was the impact of the military, war (or threat of) on you and your family? Who served? Who was injured or never returned? What would you like to share for those gathered today?
Unforgettable Book. What fictional book resonated deeply with you before the age of 18? What was it about the characters, plot, themes, or resolution that you most remember?
Radio and TV. What was your experience of TV and radio as a child? When did you first have access, and when did you listen or watch? How would you describe the role it played in your family and for you personally? How has that changed as you have aged?
Roles and Rooms. What was your role in your family growing up? How would you describe your siblings’ roles? Which rooms in your house did everyone have? Who shared a room? When did you finally get your own room?
HOLIDAY HISTORY
Wonder Food. What holiday food was especially wonderful as a child? What is the story of that food and when was the last time you remember eating it? Does it hold the same wonder for you today?
Holiday Tradition. What was the family tradition that felt most significant to you as a child? What specific memory do you have of the experience? Describe the location, smells, sounds, other sensations.
Christmas Cinema. What was a special holiday movie you remember watching as a child? What was it about the film that left the lingering impression?
First Christmas. What was your first “adult” Christmas living away from your parents? Speak of the home you lived, holiday décor, tree and ornaments. What traditions did you and your partner maintain, merge or leave?
Best Gift Ever. What was the most memorable or important gift you received as a child? Tell the story of receiving the gift. How was it wrapped and displayed? What happened in the opening and discovery? Why was it the best gift ever?
Christmas Vacation. What was a memorable Thanksgiving or Christmas spent a distance from home? How do you remember this trip? What was a mishap, funny moment or highlight remembered?
Santa Gifts and Stockings. How were gifts given in your family? Was there a wish list gifts came from or were they a surprise? How were stockings involved? What role did the legend of Santa Claus play?
Christmas Morning. What did Christmas morning mean to you as a child? Describe the scene, smells, sounds and tastes. Who was the first awake? What happened all were finally gathered?
White Christmas. Share your memories of awaking to a white, snowy Christmas morning. Where were you? Who was present? When did you go play in the snow?
Gift Giving. What was your memory of giving gifts as a child? How did you get money to spend or did you make gifts? Where did you do the shopping? How did you discern what the recipient would appreciate? Who did you remember giving gifts to? What was a particularly special gift you remember giving?
Music Playlist. Invite each participant to submit (in advance) one favorite song they enjoy singing or listening to during the holiday season. Create a playlist from the songs, play the songs and let folks vote or guess which person submitted the song.